Dear Katie

Katie passed away on August 28, 2011. I wrote this a year later. It is still a good read for when I miss her and want to reconnect, to remember the spirit she is to me. And to many of you who miss her. If you didn't know Katie, please take a look and get to... she was so special.

Dear Katie,

We love you and miss you down here. I know your still with us in spirit. I feel you particularly when I laugh a lot or when for some reason I myself am funny and make people burst into a fit of giggles. I'm so sad you are not here with us any more. My best friend and sister. It's been hard coming to accept that you are really gone. There is a hole in my gut where your presence used to be, the comfort of knowing you were here with me, trying your best to figure life out. I always knew you would find your path eventually, I never would have guessed that this was God’s plan for you. I accept it today and I’ll let you go over and over again, but I still miss you deeply and this is our time, a year after your death, to feel that.

My apology to you... I tried to hold on to you, I wish I had done more and for not, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I know my apologizing and guilt are worthless but of course I wish I had done something more. Of course. I don't know what else to say. At first, I couldn’t understand it. You always seemed to get the God idea more then anyone else. Always... You felt that in your spirit for as long as I knew you... I've come to believe you were never meant to stay long. Like Rich. Say hi to Rich for me. Big tears and a smile inserted here. You are a bright shiny light sent to burn brightly, helping to ignite others. You ignited me miss Katie. You really did.

I never felt more inspired or ready to face the world as my true self then after my conversations with you. Talking for hours about God, spirituality, our maximum potential, our possibilities and how to achieve the things we wanted.

Man. Katie, you were such a powerful spirit. You still are. It feels good to reflect on what you have meant to me the last few days... You meant more to me then you ever knew, you meant more to all of us then you ever knew. I just wish I could have told you more before you left. I hope you can hear me, feel me now?

We really miss you and the world is not the same place with out you. I assure you that, like any time someone you love passes, we have tried to live stronger... We have tried to carry a positive message out of you leaving. I have tried and tried and tried to make excuses for how y